The Goblin Diaries
Contents
Prologue
The Goblin Diaries began as a simple idea: if I was going to spend years painting an army, it might as well be the most unhinged and entertaining force in all of Warhammer. Orcs and Goblins have always appealed to me for exactly that reason. They are the antidote to discipline and a perfect excuse to fill the tabletop with noise and colour.
The Dwarfs have always been my favourite: disciplined, resilient, and clinging to their strongholds with a quiet, stubborn dignity. They represent everything ordered and enduring in a world that keeps trying to swallow them. Goblins, though… they live at the opposite end of that spectrum. They bicker, argue, trip over their own plans, and somehow turn chaos into momentum. That contrast is exactly what makes building a goblin army so enjoyable for me. It’s a chance to explore the messy, noisy side of the setting.
So the Bloody Spearzs took shape: a tribe of opportunistic goblins entrenched around Mount Gunbad, clinging to its treacherous slopes in the eastern World Edge Mountains. From a half-hidden camp in the western foothills, they ambush the weary Dwarf caravans struggling along the old Silver Road. Their Warboss, Zrunk, dreams of uncovering forgotten Dwarfen vaults and long-lost treasures… though in truth he’s delighted by anything poorly guarded.
To keep this adventure structured and enjoyable, the Goblin Diaries are organised into Seasons. Each Season represents 500 points of painted models, divided into individual chapters. Every chapter follows one unit or character, telling their story and charting their progress from unpainted scrap to fully finished model. When a chapter is completed, the Season dashboard updates, replacing the Bloody Spearzs crest with a glamour shot of the finished piece.
Bit by bit, the tribe grows. And when one 500-point Season ends, another begins, bringing new characters and new mischief.
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| The bloody spearzs lair |
SEASON I – THE BLOODY SPEARZS MUSTER (500 points)
Chapter I: The bouncing bunch
Skilka, the curious goblin, watched from a safe distance as the Squig Hoppers charged towards the unsuspecting human settlement of Zenres. He couldn't help but marvel at the sheer lunacy of the Bloody Spearzs, as they rode their squigs straight into the town without a care in the world.
As the goblin riders wreaked havoc on the town, Skilka watched with a mixture of awe and amusement. He giggled as one of the squigs bounced towards the Town Crier and bit his arm off, sending the poor bastard running for his life.
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| Squig Hopers launching an attack on Zenres |
Chapter II: Goblins, beer… and flatulence
The Night Goblins, known for their mischievous ways, wasted no time in ransacking the town's supply of beer and wine.
Amidst the chaos, an unexpected turn unfolded. A Night Goblin, notorious for his flatulent prowess, found himself appointed as the group's musician. With each cheeky fart, his flatulence served as an oddly satisfying musical backdrop to the raid.
Meanwhile, the perpetually frustrated group boss struggled to impose any semblance of order. Goblins guzzled beer straight from casks, danced in wild abandon, and stumbled upon a particularly potent weed that turned their mischief into fits of giggles. As expected, a drinking competition ensued, goblins collapsing in a chaotic contest of resilience and inebriation. Zenres, once a tranquil haven, now echoed with the chaotic laughter of goblins on a rampage.
As the Bloody Spears drank their fill and revelled in their conquest, Skilka cast a mischievous glance back at the now-desolate Zenres. His heart swelled with the satisfaction of having orchestrated mayhem.
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| Night Goblins at their best |
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| Snotlings scrapping for some liquor |
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| Unfortunate Goblin took the bet...and lost! |
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| Mixture of equipment represents their scavenger nature |
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